1. Wow not sure it's possible to go for anyone to go for it harder than this man, MiloMolly
The best man getting drunk and asking his current wife for a divorce into the microphone because "she just wont fucking leave me unless i make a big deal of it"
2. Nothing like a reminder of the permanence of death on the greatest day of your life, Badwolf97
The only thing the best man said was "Well, we're all here today for one reason, a good woman died. May she Rest In Peace." About the grooms late (first) wife, who passed away over 10 years ago.
3. Everybody got really dressed up for this bday, huh, cola_zerola?
A groomsman got drunk and went up to give a speech and wished my husband and I a happy birthday.
4. Suck it! That's what you get for wanting love in your life more than once! Via Zomblot
"we all know she's been down this road before" from the brides brother at her second wedding.
5. It'll be the best four years of your life kid, live it up. From Ajiatrow
I wasn't there to see it, but a buddy of mine told me about a bad one he witnessed his cousin give. Basically, best man got all flustered/froze up, didn't know what to say, etc., and he ended up congratulating my friend (who was not the groom, mind you) on being accepted into the University of Michigan.
6. Gotta make sure the family knows about your orgasms, cn2092
Maid of honor giving her speech. "We have so many great memories together. One of my favorite was when you taught me about the jets in the hot tub."
...obviously implying masturbation. In front of a room of three hundred people. Dead silence.
7. Awww Lemonlyric, how romantic!
I was at a wedding where the grooms grandfather gave a speech. He stepped up to the mic and said, "(Groom), I hope you made the right choice." Then just walked off. Old people waste no time speaking their feelings. Everyone cracked up. The Bride was cool about it.
Grooms vows: "I love that you let me stick my finger up your butt while you're sleeping..."
The whole audience went still, and there was a very uncomfortable silence followed by a few unsure chuckles. The look she gave him was terrifying. And the pastor performing the ceremony didn't seem to know how to react.
Overall it was extremely awkward,
9. You guys its not that hard, just don't stand up for a speech you don't have to scardboy
Was at a friends wedding, one of my friends stands up to make a speech and it was pretty good until the last sentence when he said "who knows this could've been my wedding if I didn't mess things up with her" everyone was silent
10. rooostur at this point might as well have the speech be YOUR WIFE IS UGLY
Best man speech: "Back in high school when Bill first told me he liked Jackie I said Jackie!? Ewww! But that's how I knew Bill really liked her for who she was as a person ." ....Jackie was not very attractive
11. Aww this seems like a strong marriage to me, Notrightnowplease_
My husband and I went to get married at City Hall and accidentally walked into the place that handles divorce and annulments. An employee pointed it out to us and my husband said "Okay, we'll be back here next year then."
12. Folks don't bring up your dead exes. Just trust me, yimiguchi
"I'd like to take this time to welcome the bride into our family. I've been told you have a clean bill of health so let's hope the third time's the charm."
I said that at my father's 3rd wedding. He's a two time widower.
13. Yeah words probably would've been the way to go SausageDeliveryBoy
Best man waddles up to podium, visibly too drunk. He opens up his folder with his speech in it. Opens his mouth to say his first words and projectile vomits directly over the podium. He says into the mic, "Whoops that's not what I meant to say." Groomsmen drag him off and away.
14. Nothing like your dad cuckolding youo on your wedding day eh, loud_morning_farter?
My dad made a speech at my brother's wedding saying that if my brother didn't get to her first he would have married her. It was so awkward and so inappropriate.
15. Last chance, Elizabeth you sure you don't want in? From dontFart_InSpaceSuit
mother of the groom called the wife 'Elizabeth' in her speech. Elizabeth wasn't her name. Elizabeth was the name of the groom's best friend who happened to be an attractive woman. more attractive than the wife. Elizabeth is who the mother wanted her son to marry. Elizabeth was there, too.