IT is a legitimately great film - it's fun, scary, tense, and a great deal of care went into the characters and their relationship with one another. It's genuinely a breath of fresh air for the horror genre, and one that will hopefully lead Hollywood to take some meaningful lessons from what the movie did right.

Except for one thing - the opening sequence where Pennywise talks to Georgie. Basically, it's really really dumb to assume a kid would just chat with a sewer clown (and a horrifying looking one, at that) and think the clown was funny and nice. No kid would think this. That's why we rewrote the scene so it would actually make sense:

  1. Pennywise

    Hi Georgie!

  2. Georgie


  3. Pennywise

    W-what? It's me, Pennywise, the dancing clown!

  4. Georgie

    Oh hell no dude, no way. Clowns are scary as shit.

  5. Pennywise

    Uh....aren't kids delighted by clowns? Don't you find clowns non-threatening and fun?

  6. Georgie

    No. Absolutely not. No one thinks that.

  7. Pennywise

    I thought kids had clowns at birthday parties and stuff?

  8. Georgie

    It's not 1957, dude. Clowns are horrifying. Everyone knows that. Ever hear of John Wayne Gacy?

  9. Pennywise

    Oh. Hmmm. So...you aren't enticed and calmed by my appearance?

  10. Georgie

    A creepyass clown hanging out in a sewer drain? Uh, no. Not at all. That is the least enticing thing I can imagine.

  11. Pennywise

    Well....what WOULD you find nonthreatening and delightful?

  12. Georgie

    Are you stupid or something, dude? It's 1988 - if you're trying to lure kids into sewers, just make yourself look like the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.

  13. Pennywise

    What? What's that? I've been asleep for 27 years.

  14. Georgie

    Just trust me - kids would be super into it, at least more than a freaky-lookin clown who's inexplicably hanging out in the gross sewers.

  15. Pennywise

    It just sounds like "mutant turtle ninjas" would be even freakier.

  16. Georgie

    No, definitely not. They're fun, kids like 'em, and it would actually make SENSE for them to be in sewers. Like, even if I liked clowns, I probably would be confused as to why you were in the sewer.

  17. Pennywise

    Okay, honestly - that's a fair criticism.

  18. Georgie

    You're just never gonna lure any kids into any sewers with this schtick. Really, TMNT is perfect. I honestly have no idea how you hadn't landed on that yet.

  19. Pennywise

    Okay okay, I get it. Any idea which of these "mutant turtles" I should do?

  20. Georgie

    Michelangelo is probably the friendliest and most inviting. Probably go with that. Just say "Cowabunga" and "Radical" and you'll be set.

  21. Pennywise

    Got it, got it. Thanks Georgie. C'mon, bring it in.

  22. [Georgie reaches into the sewer to shake Pennywise's hand]
  23. Georgie

    My pleasure. Good luck.

  24. [Georgie pulls his hand back out]
  25. Pennywise

    Ah ya know what? I coulda ripped off your arm right there and pulled you into the sewer.

  26. Georgie

    Ha, you totally coulda! Really blew that opportunity.

  27. Pennywise

    Well, maybe next time. As Michelangelo! Coward-bunghole!

  28. Georgie


  29. Pennywise

    Oh. Huh. Guess I'm really behind on slang these days!

  30. Georgie

    Ah don't worry man, you'll pick it up.

  31. Pennywise

    Thanks Georgie.

  32. Georgie

    No worries dude.

And, with that, IT made itself look like Michelangelo and murdered literally every child in Derry super easily. Everyone was pretty psyched to jump into a sewer with Michelangelo, way way more than they would with a nightmare sewer clown at least.

The End.