5 The Time Passer

You can't find anything good on Netflix. Why not, right?


6 Your Partners Not In The Mood

They say it takes two to tango, but that's not always the case. Sometimes your tango partner isn't in the mood to dance and so you have to get out there on the dancefloor and cut a rug all by yourself. Is it slightly sadder dancing a two person dance all by yourself? Maybe. When the rhythm strikes you, who are you to refuse the call. (Just to clarify, by dancing alone I mean masturbating when your partner doesn't feel like having sex. Just wanna make sure that's clear.)


7 The Sleep Aid

It's 2 a.m. and you can't sleep. You've tried warm milk. You've tried watching a little TV. You've tried just about everything, but you can't seem to shut your brain off. If you're gonna get some Z's tonight you're going to have to take matters into your own hand. (Wink) It doesn't always work, but, hey, even if you don't get to sleep, at least you got to masturbate.



We all do it, amiright? It's perfectly normal, right? RIGHT?!?!?!