Ah yes, the famous MILF Hunter, hunting all the MILFs with what must be a ginormous schlong.
Don't pet the animals but please, please pet my vagina? Please? Anyone?
The tear tattoos represent the many nights he's cried, knowing that he's living a lie.
"Oh yes, I know how the ladies love to place their boobs onto things, they're always dropping their boobs everywhere!"
"Dudes, I swear pussy looks JUST like my sweaty-ass armpit. I've seen like, a million."
I mean he obviously is a lover of moms. And really, wants wrong with that?
One lady loved it so much she said "You know, you should consider getting this tattooed to your face, do the other ladies a favor for cryin' out loud."
"Just incase they forget when they're doing sex to me from behind!"
"DID EVERYONE SEE ME CROSS THIS OFF MY LIST? DID YOU SEE IT? THAT MEANS I SEXED TODAY. I put my thingy in her thingy and we thingy-bumped."
Okay how about 5 cents? To have sex with me?...2 cents? You're bustin' my balls here... except that you're not doing anything to my balls at all...
We like you. Do you like us too?