How do you know when you've met "The One"? Just look for these 8 soul-matey characteristics:

1. They Constantly Run Away To Go Brood In Nature

Nothing says "Future Soul Mate" quite like someone with a constant desire to leave their dreary day-to-day lives for huge chunks of time to go sit out on rocks or tree limbs and sigh longingly. This lets you know that they're into nature and the outside world and aren't cooped up in boring routines like jobs or castle stuff, making them ideal for dating. You can go on dates in nature, and stuff.


2. They're Never In The Right Place When They're Needed

Is there anything more boring than a significant other who's always in the right place when people are calling them? The true sign of a fun, spontaneous free-spirit is when they're being called for some reason and they aren't in the room and everyone gasps.

Where are they? I dunno, out exploring or whatever. It's not important. What IS important, though, is that they know there's more important things in life than just being places they're supposed to be.


3. They're Beloved By Wild Animals, Even Extremely Dangerous Ones


My mother always told me, "Never get married to someone expecting you'll be able to change them." Or, in other words, if someone isn't already constantly being nuzzled by tigers and having birds land on their fingers and whistle, it's not gonna start happening after you start dating them. Just know that.



4. They Point Out Little Stuff In The World You Might Have Missed, But It's Magical

The ideal mate should be able to notice and point out little things along the ground or in nature that ordinary norm-o schlubs don't care about, like fireflies and shit. If someone notices and enjoys fireflies, or chuckles at a little chipmunk that tries to grab a seed and messes up, they're probably awesome and you should date them.