Usual Activities: Sharing thinkpieces from websites whose URLs include the word "Mind", avoiding one specific food because they read one thing about how bad it is ("you have any IDEA what the conditions are like at these edamame farms??"), not voting cause they're all equally full of shit anyway so what's the fuckin' point?

Typical Quote: "Democrats? Republicans? Nah man, there's only one party and it's a god damned dollar sign. It's all a fuckin' joke and we're the punchline."



Usual Activities: Burning his thumb and playing it off, pretending he's not coughing, constantly mentioning the three specific things he's heard about pot

Typical Quote: "I'm not feeling it yet. Should I be feeling it? Did I do it right? Is anyone else feeling it? Are we sure this pot is good? Actually maybe I'm feeling it. Nahh I don't think I am..."


Usual Activities: Wearing black band t-shirts, being unclear about whether he is or ever was a student at the school, sitting with his arm around the nearest female and not picking up on any social cues, inviting people to subsequent locations and finding no takers

Typical Quote: "Boss at U-Haul ridin' my ass again for being friggin' six minutes late. SIX MINUTES! Whatever. Pass that shit, fellow students."


Usual Activities: Laughing way too hard at a specific word but maybe he just really enjoys it, eating handfuls of cereal out of the box but he might've actually skipped lunch and could just be hungry, saying some paranoid stuff but he might be joking, working for the school newspaper

Typical Quote: "Oh sweet, Super Troopers is on"


Usual Activities:
Repeating a story about the last time he tried to get high and was the only person not having fun, eating entire brownies quickly while shrugging, puking into the dormroom trashcan

Typical Quote: "That pot must've been laced with something cause I've smoked twice before and never felt a thing. Was there Molly in that pot? I think there was Molly in that pot. Dude, careful, there might be Molly in that pot."



Usual Activities: Hanging that one Bob Marley Poster, judging you for your only-mild liking of Phish, knowing anything about incense, burying shirts with pot-leaf logos deep into his laundry so his mom won't notice

Typical Quote: "If everyone just smoked pot all the time, there'd be no problems in the world, man." [Room chuckles] "What?"


The Definitive Guide To Smoking Pot For The First Time

If People Talked About Drugs Like They Talked About Coffee

Honest Anti-Marijuana PSAs