Dear Internet Makers/Maintainers,
It has recently come to my attention that some people have been using the Internet to post unwholesome content. Now, I really do not want to alarm you, I'm sure there are just a couple of "bad seeds" out there ruining the web's pristine reputation. However, many, many, websites currently include pictures, words and even videos that are inappropriate.
One of my foremost complaints is that the other day I visited my favorite search engine and there was a cartoon spider hanging from a cartoon web at the top of the page. Yes, I realize that it is close to Halloween time and I'm sure that they were trying to be festive, but before these things are posted, you really should consider how it could affect others. You know that some people are scared of spiders, don't you? What if children or seniors were exposed to this sort of thing? It is simply not worth it to take these risks when so much could go wrong.
Another thing I noticed is that some of the comments on YouTube videos can be, quite frankly, unsavory. For example, under my "Cutest Kittens of 2014" video, a real heated argument took place, and not even about which kitten was the cutest! You see, AssHatLolz actually called fartmaster37 a "stoopid idot" right there, on the web for everyone to see! It just seems unkind to me, how would fartmaster37's mother feel if she saw that? If I didn't know better, I would think that some people on YouTube were actually starting fights on purpose! Can you imagine? Please tell AssHatLolz to be nicer.
One thing that may come as a surprise to you is that I have stumbled upon some content on the Internet that was not true! In some cases, websites were presenting facts and figures that had been made up. In addition to this, some words have been shortened beyond comprehension or spelled incorrectly.
I am sure that you and your staff are working very hard to proofread all of the webpages before they are posted but it does seem that errors are slipping through the cracks. Obviously there is just too much for you to keep track of, who could have known the Internet would be so popular? I'm sure you haven't slept well in years! So, just so that you are aware, I am a very good speller and I am retired. If you ever need any help with revising the webpages and making sure the Internet keeps a high standard, I can help you with that. I have included my e-mail address at the bottom of the page.
Thank you for your time. I know that, together, we can make the web into something that we can all be proud of. Let's make the Internet synonymous with honor, trust and integrity.
Also, if you have time, could you please put up some more dick pics?