Weekly TV Show Followship
God(s): Weiner; Gilligan; The Two-R'd Martin
Places of worship: Not NBC.
Beliefs: To find out life's true meaning would only be to spoil it.
The Church Of MORNING COFFEE And Latte Day Saints
God(s): Keurig; He Who Writes The Names; Interns
Places of worship: Most buildings.
Beliefs: Don't even TALK to God before he's had his coffee ;-)
Orthodox Order Out For Foodaism
God(s): Hub, Grub; The One Without Seams
Places of worship: Your apartment.
Beliefs: If one wants to experience deliverance, they should show thy true self within 20 minutes or less.
God(s): Schwarzenegger; Rock, The; Ripped Elders Of Gymnasium
Places of worship: Mondays: Back and Biceps, Tuesday/Thursdays: Chest and Legs, Friday: Cardio, Saturday: Sin Day
Beliefs: All good things come to those who whey.
Phonotheism, the worship of the one true phone
Appostles: Twitter; Snapchat; Instagram, son of Facebook
Places of worship: Bed, toilet, car, school, toilet, work, car, toilet, couch, bed
Beliefs: The age of enlightenment is now. Or now. Or maybe now. One sec.
Church of SportsFantology
God(s): He Who Is Paid The Most
Places of worship: Fan Interest Level's I-IV: Internet, Level's V-VI: TV, Level VII: Stadiums, Level VIII:. Revealed only to those who reach Level VIII.
Beliefs: You cannot measure one's life by their successes nor defeats, but instead, only by one's amount of fun they were having out there.
DankBudhism (and the art of transcendental self-medication)
God(s): Siblings, Older; Celebrities, Stoner; He Who Discovered Leftovers
Places of worship: Colorado, Washington, The Other 48 States
Beliefs: No one has EVER died from worship. Look it up. Check the facts.
God(s): Jameson; Jeremy; That Hot Person You Saw On The Way To Work
Places of worship: More places than you'd be comfortable knowing about.
Beliefs: All men were NOT created equal.