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The Ultimate Facebook Status Update
By Caldwell Tanner and Alex Watt
1. Jeff looks at his phone, it shows a facebook notification. Tim looks up from his computer and responds. Jeff: “Wow, I got five likes on the status I just posted.” Tim: “Pfft, that’s it? Dude, I could get 1,000 likes on a post EASY. 2. Jeff, looking annoyed, addresses Tim with a challenge. Jeff: Oh yeah? 3. Close up on Jeff’s face, he is super serious. Jeff: PROVE IT. 4. Tim looks hesitant. His face is heavily shadowed. Tim: D-don’t make me do this, man. You might regret it. Jeff: HA! I Knew you were bluffing, dude. Just admit it! 5. Tim begins typing. Tim: NEVER. Challenge Accepted! 6. Jeff looks at Tim’s screen. It reads “RIP JEFF. Gonna miss u BROLO!” Jeff: Hrm. I’m not sure I get i- 7. Tim stabs Jeff with a knife. 8. Ghost Jeff, now in heaven, checks his phone. It shows that Tim’s status now has 1,004 likes and several comments. One of the comments is from Tim’s Ghost: It says “seriously dude?” and has only 4 likes. Tim: I can’t believe that fucking worked.