"Body of Missing Man Found"

The body of a 30-year-old insurance salesman who had been reported missing since early last week was discovered dead in Metropolis Park Thursday.

Police interviewed on the scene said the man was shot six times in the chest at point-blank range, but did not reveal the cause of death….

"Construction Worker Falls from High Rise"

Tragedy struck the Metropolis financial district Monday when a 41-year-old sheetrock installer fell from the twenty-sixth floor of the unfinished Luthor Tower.

Witness to the accident were several of the man's coworkers, who were presumably too shocked to fly to the man's rescue….

"Metropolis U. Advances to Playoffs"

The Metropolis University football squad beat long-time rival Kansas State Tuesday, scoring a risky two-point conversion in the fourth quarter to win, 15-14.

However, famed Metropolis wide receiver Tommy White delivered a disappointing performance, running an average of 6 yards per play—a speed not remotely close to Mach 1.

"Celebrity Anchorwoman Dedicates New Library"

Popular WGBS anchorwoman Lana Lang spoke on the steps of the Metropolis Public Library Wednesday as part of a dedication ceremony for the library's newly opened Renaissance wing. She was not wearing underwear….

"Pedestrians Going 'Cuckoo' over City's Pigeon Problem"

Metropolis has always lived peacefully with the domestic pigeons that share our city. But recently, the birds' rapidly growing population has some citizens on the verge of frying the feathered fiends with the powerful laser beams that shoot from their eyes….

"Kryptonite Stolen from City Laboratory"

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