Tonight is the State of the Union address. But…it's also Tuesday.

Don't let your desire to be politically informed affect your desire to be drunk by 9:30pm.

Here's what you do:

Every time that Bush says nucular, God Bless America, terrorist,
or blinks more thank 4 times at once, take a sip of your non-American beer.

And remember, enjoy it while it lasts. Because after college, it's called alcoholism.

[Disclaimer: The above quote was stolen from some girl I met freshman year. I don't remember who she was though. I was probably drunk when we met.]